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Post by Kerrick on Jun 28, 2017 10:59:22 GMT -6
Hi all, This is a great community and I will definitely miss it, but it’s time for me to move on from this forum. There have just been too many differences amongst the leadership here and by me sticking to my principles, my presence is having a negative effect on the community. Me sticking around any longer would just be selfish and I care about y’all too much for that. I’m not difficult to get ahold of though and would love to hear from you, how I can continue praying for you, and how everyone’s awesome musical projects are progressing and the like. Email is probably the best means of contacting me. My address is my username + “_65” at yahoo.com. I’m also on Facebook, and the The Christian Metal Realm forum. Thank you for all the encouragement, prayers, and sweet band recommendations! -Kerrick
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Post by nocturnaliridescence on Jun 28, 2017 13:38:07 GMT -6
You aren't having a negative impact on the community, you just, as you said, don't agree with leadership decisions. You could just revoke your mod status or something, there's no need to leave.
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Post by exo on Jun 28, 2017 17:08:59 GMT -6
Booooooo.
Rubbish and poppycock.
Thomas and yourself have some extremely differing views and philosophies on things....... big whoop. If you don't wish to work as staff under that leadership......then don't.
BUT
It's actually NOT affecting here at all, from what I see. You guys may have significant conflict it YOUR relationship, but that's not "the board", and there are other ways for that to be dealt with. Beating a hasty retreat is gonna leave quite a few people disappointed, and I'm gonna personally ask you to reconsider that decision.....
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Post by Thomas Eversole on Jun 28, 2017 17:41:07 GMT -6
Kerrick. When I emailed you on April 21st and said I meant it. It makes no sense for "a pillar" in this community to leave because of one person. ...which is precisely why I started posting again, and getting settled into home. I would never delete your account. Hate to pull rank, but there's no way, literally, that you could make me do it either. The only thing I'd ever want to delete of yours is this post after you wake up. Apart from your interactions with me, you being a mod here or not is unrelated to what we're butting heads about. If you staying means you having the access on this board to "moderate the admin", then we can talk about it, because I definitely trust you. I think the topic of Jesus Christ and Christian black metal can be separate from whatever the hell crap we've ever fought about. Now get your ass back here, so I can delete this post, find a group hug emoji and throw it in a new post. We love you Kerrick. Literally.
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Post by Thomas Eversole on Jun 30, 2017 11:30:05 GMT -6
Well, we're 2 days and counting on awaiting a response. I'm not sure if this is the beginning of the end regarding a permanent "goodbye", or if more time is needed to weigh these replies.
If Kerrick is indeed not coming back, then this is my recommendation to the forum. ____________________________
We should do what we've always done when a major figure of this scene leaves for good.
With a hole in our hearts, we press on... Press on as best we can without them.
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Post by Kerrick01 on Jul 5, 2017 13:19:43 GMT -6
Hi all, Thank you for the very kind words. I think I should clarify a bit from my original post. My decision was NOT due to differences in worldviews/philosophies or the like, and certainly not due to any mod abilities I did or didn’t have. Rather, it was one of principles I guess. Without getting into too much detail (for those who didn’t see the thread), there was some discussion in a thread in the Spirit Of Anonymity that I believe for a Christian site, shouldn’t exist – and certainly not defended. I spoke up which caused a bit of a stir/discord (which most of you know, I have a tendency of doing here). My options then were to a) stick to my principles and keep fighting against what I believe to be sinful – and thus cause more division here than I’ve already caused, b) succumb to being told to be quiet and thus go against my principles and [silently] take part in [what I believe to be] sin and therefore also have a negative effect on the community here, or c) flee from the [perceived by me] sin. If I had received a different initial response than I did or if I thought this was just a one-time and isolated event, I’d probably have acted differently. But this time around I really felt between a rock and a hard place and I feel it would have been wrong – and I would argue sinful - for me to choose option a) or b). And even if this specific instance got sorted out somehow, I believe another one would inevitably arise again. Anyways, I hope that clarifies things somewhat. Y’all know how to get ahold of me so don’t be strangers.
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Post by barabbas on Jul 5, 2017 13:26:27 GMT -6
Thanks for this, Kerrick. It helps me not be so confused. I don't have access to SoA, and so didn't know anything was up. The last dust up of which I was aware was several months ago. Fare thee well, and God bless.
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Post by Thomas Eversole on Jul 5, 2017 17:44:33 GMT -6
Rather, it was one of principles I guess. Without getting into too much detail (for those who didn’t see the thread), there was some discussion in a thread in the Spirit Of Anonymity that I believe for a Christian site, shouldn’t exist – and certainly not defended. I spoke up which caused a bit of a stir/discord (which most of you know, I have a tendency of doing here). Principle is right. There's the principle of gossip, versus the principle of confidentiality. I'll elaborate on said discussion. There's a thread in the Spirit of Anonymity called "CMR characters", which is little more than a collection of rants regarding the behaviors of people on The Christian Metal Realm. I think its safe to say I probably did most of the ranting. I thought it was quite helpful to 1) get things off my chest and 2) be called out on my thinking errors, in regards to what I was thinking/saying... after all, a problem shared is half repaired. ...but being blasted for even saying something to begin with? What good is a confidential room if we can't what's on our minds, especially when what's on our minds ARE OTHER PEOPLE? I won't get into defining gossip. My opinion, there's a world of difference between gossiping and talking about someone without them knowing about it. As far as not thinking the thread shouldn't exist, I call shenanigans. - for one, the thread started in August 2015 and 7 PAGES LATER, this is the first I've ever heard a MODERATOR saying a thread shouldn't exist - for two, Kerrick actively participated in said thread, only cosigning "the gossip principle" once I started laying my beef out about Adam, one of his friends. - for three, if I thought the existence of said thread was going to be the catalyst to an important member here leaving, I would have deleted it in seconds - no questions asked, but again, this is the first I've heard of it, so... massive communication fail. My options then were to a) stick to my principles and keep fighting against what I believe to be sinful – and thus cause more division here than I’ve already caused, b) succumb to being told to be quiet and thus go against my principles and [silently] take part in [what I believe to be] sin and therefore also have a negative effect on the community here, or c) flee from the [perceived by me] sin. The only problem with that is, your C choice is little more than the ultimate form of your B choice. You're not "fleeing from sin". You found one apple you didn't like so you threw the whole basket of apples out. I don't have access to SoA, and so didn't know anything was up. The last dust up of which I was aware was several months ago. Well, several months ago (via email to me) Kerrick threatened to leave as well. I'm now of the opinion that if it wouldn't have been over this thread in the SoA, it would have been something else where our viewpoints clashed. It was only a matter of time. Looks like this was the time...
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Post by Kerrick01 on Jul 6, 2017 12:46:53 GMT -6
Ugh I’m sorry guys. I really didn’t want this… I felt I owed everyone an explanation but I didn’t mean to condemn Thomas or anyone else. As he said (and I said in the thread in question), I participated in it too and feel guilty for doing so. I wish I hadn’t and it’s on me to seek forgiveness for my own actions. Lately I’ve been feeling quite convicted of my inclination towards gossip and when that thread turned particularly strong, it was the perfect storm for me I guess. It had less to do with who it was about than the kinds of things being said about anyone, but the fact that it was about someone I consider to be a friend probably had some subconscious effect.
I don’t remember threatening leaving before, though I know I considered leaving – but I’ll take Thomas’ word for it because he keeps better track of that kind of stuff than I do. However, at least in this case, I felt it’d be wrong/arrogant of me to try to bully anyone around by making some sort of ultimatum – as if my presence here could or should pull that much weight anyways.
Again, I am so very sorry for causing yet another upstir with this. I hate that this happens every time I open my mouth here. I don’t want to argue so I’ll just leave with letting you know that I’m sorry for causing yet another debacle.
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Post by Thomas Eversole on Jul 6, 2017 14:22:17 GMT -6
Good grief Kerrick. You weren't gossiping in that thread. Neither was I. I don't think there's anything to feel guilty about so I'm not sure why that thread all of a sudden flagged as gossip in your brain? (maybe the subconscious effect like you mentioned) I knew I had a massive resentment against Adam, and praying and keeping quiet about it wasn't budging it. So I dumped all my anger and bias in that thread for my closest online friends to see. You bailed before you saw the conclusion, but I've been praying for Adam - for his happiness and well being. I an no longer angry at him. Granted, it was a very "destroying my room so I'm more motivated to clean it" approach, but it worked for me. Ultimately, everything said there was the precursor to resolve. I didn't realize how bad I had it until I laid everything out so I could inventory it. I said, multiple times, that my thinking was messed up regarding this, but somehow that got lost in the horror of what I was saying? I seriously just got to feeling better about all of this because I finally got it out - I didn't realize how long I was holding onto this... The posts you've seen regarding Adam were the result of this eating me alive. Took me a minute to figure that out. ..... That is 100% my fault. I made an error. I will do everything in my power to ensure that does not happen again. I did snap at you Kerrick - I more or less meant everything I said, but the extreme amount of pain I was in (outlined in this thread) I didn't say it the best way - and that's an understatement. My delivery SUCKED and for that, I'm sorry. I should have used a different word than "threatened". You stated you might as well leave, and I felt like I all but groveled to get you to stay. I felt like I'm doing it again in this thread, but I don't know what else to do now. Kerrick, if you decide to come back, whether 1 day or 12 years later, you're ALWAYS welcome here with open arms. I'm NEVER deleting your account, so it will be here as long as this forum is here. If you want to be a regular Joe here - cool. If you want to just post as a guest - cool. If you're not coming back until that thread is gone, then consider it gone, if you come back. If you staying means you having the access on this board to "moderate the admin", then we can talk about it, because I definitely trust you. This is on the table as long as your account here, if this is what you want. Big picture, this isn't even about me. If it makes you feel better to stay here and ignore me completely - then please do it! I don't think you realize how much the other people here need you, and its only making a bad situation worse by leaving them because me and some dumb thread set you off. Bailing after 2 years here isn't just punishing me - its punishing everyone here, and those who have yet to come. Leave me hanging all you want, but don't leave everyone else here hanging. The Christian black metal scene, whatever that is and whoever is in it, needs all the help it can get. We can't afford to be losing warriors because of some damn fine print when we're still on the same side, and we still have the same goals. I can't make you come back. I don't know what else to say.
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Post by doommaster on Jul 6, 2017 15:21:30 GMT -6
Well, we're 2 days and counting on awaiting a response. I'm not sure if this is the beginning of the end regarding a permanent "goodbye", or if more time is needed to weigh these replies. If Kerrick is indeed not coming back, then this is my recommendation to the forum. ____________________________ We should do what we've always done when a major figure of this scene leaves for good. With a hole in our hearts, we press on... Press on as best we can without them. Guess I am in the dark here. Kerrick has left? That does suck but other than him exactly WHO are the major figures of the scene that are leaving for good? I am a little lost.
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Post by nocturnaliridescence on Jul 6, 2017 16:34:28 GMT -6
Guess I am in the dark here. Kerrick has left? That does suck but other than him exactly WHO are the major figures of the scene that are leaving for good? I am a little lost. It's all explained in this thread, isn't it? EDIT: Wait, there are posts I haven't read. When I saw Kerrick's "guest" post, I just assumed it was the previous one. I'll read the new posts, and then edit this post again. EDIT2: Yes, everything should be explained in this thread. As for the new posts, I think Thomas made a lot of good points.
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Post by Thomas Eversole on Jul 6, 2017 18:40:36 GMT -6
That does suck but other than him exactly WHO are the major figures of the scene that are leaving for good? When it comes to this small scene/forum, ANYONE leaving creates massive damage. ...especially if they've been around for years before throwing in the towel.
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